The Long Flight

January 14, 2019

Congratulations on winning that fantastic overseas trip from the big name game show on television! You have been seen by a national audience, have family and friends cheering you on and an outrageous tax bill to cover everything that you won! Hurray!

Just think about the possibilities before you – long flights from somewhere nowhere close to your hometown, cramped seating, awful food and the off chance of having someone less than pleasant sitting next to you snoring in a tone similar to a chainsaw, crashing elephant, small tsunami and trashing octopus! Or better yet, a small child who is screaming the entire flight because, well, it is a small child, and this is what they do best!

This could be the 1980’s when all of this was commonplace. Granted; it is still commonplace, but you, you, the savvy, wise and fortunate person have technology! Huzzah!

You are flying in the age of technology. You have a plethora of technology at your fingertips, and those fingertips are itching with anticipation of browsing Facebook, Instagram, Twitter among many other social platforms. Music, e-books, games, camera, video, tropical disease sites and who knows what else is on your iPhone because you have the latest and best iPhone on the market – the iPhone XS!

Ah yes; you and your fancy iPhone XS with Apple’s latest and best innovations including apps that absolutely no one uses and a U2 album that has tons of dedicated people scanning forums, on the Internet, which you have currently, on how to get rid of it!

Bask in your glory, your awesomeness, your savvy, your backlight gleaming into your face as you spend time doing all of the above things. You are in the zone, earbuds in and quite comfortable.

And you haven’t even left the tarmac for what will surely be a long flight. There are not many flights coming out of SlapOut, Ala. (Or a good number of places in Ala., but there I go again. Sorry.) You are expecting to be between airports and in the air for the better part of a day. Again, you are not worried! Technology! iPhone XS! Earbuds! Trying to pronounce really long medical terms! You are indeed set.

You nestle back, comfortable and a slight smile crossing your face. Yes; you are in command.

In command of an iPhone XS with a 35 percent charge left, and you have no charger…. Well, you HAVE a charger, but it is packed in your luggage at the bottom of the plane. Hopefully. Airlines are notorious for losing luggage.

That smile quickly fades. You become nervous, ill-feeling and have cold sweats. There is no way you can survive everything that is going on around you without your iPhone XS. Sorry; you are going to have to look at the old inflight magazines featuring products no one cares about.

Or do you? Of course you don’t! You, in case you have forgotten, are savvy, wise and with technology! You were smart. You went to Zohmo and found the perfect battery case for your iPhone XS. This charging case will keep your battery longer than a standard battery and help you survive this incredibly long flight. Good job on having some forethought! Enjoy your flight.

The magazine, as a last digression before I run away, does not sell ointment or iPhone XS battery cases. Zohmo does. Charging cases; not ointment.